4 Ways I'm Trying Not to Be Jealous

As a musician, I deal with rejection all the time.  Not everyone likes what I do or the kind of music I play.  It's what that rejection does to me that matters.  It's how I perceive that rejection or judgement that matters.  It's all about how I compare myself to other people.  Ugh.  This is the most useless thing I have ever bought into!  I've heard it said that "judging your outsides by my insides" is a trap of self obsession.  As a voice over director, I have seen people destroyed by some teacher or casting director and let their work suffer from an opinion that was hurtful to them and being jealous of another's success.  I have also seen the disappointment when dreams don't come true on someone's time schedule and plans of fame and fortune are postponed. So, today I want to talk about how I, as a creative person deal with this stuff and maybe throw in a little advice too.

Here are the reasons I still create and try not to buy in to my judgments.

1. SUCCESS? As someone who at one point in my life never thought I would make music at any level again,  I am successful!  I got a late start making records but I have made 3 and am in the middle of #4.  Success to me is that - I write songs, people want to play their instruments on these songs for low pay and a sandwich and I am fulfilled.  Occasionally, I have a song placed in film or TV or another artist wants to record it but the true success is in the creating. I have to do it.
2. I HAVE TO DO IT  I need to create stuff and I need to be around other people who do that too.    When I am in my studio alone, I have ideas to improve my classes, my demos, my webinars (coming soon) and my music.  I may have other things to do but I always take time out to try new things.  I have learned to call people, complete strangers to ask them how they did things and what it did for them as an artist. If I don't investigate I can't let it go.  If I don't try new things, I am stuck.  If I don't have relationships with other artists, I am nowhere.
3. MY INSIDES vs. YOUR OUTSIDES You're not making a six figure income from your art, you are not sipping cocktails on your private island contemplating your take over of the world. Directors and Producers are not pounding on your door and your publishing deal is nonexistent.  None of that matters.  When someone's success story inspires you, that matters.  Be the person you are meant to be and don't get trapped in what you think you need to be happy in life.  You may find out that what you want and what you need are two different things.  If you have a "day Job" you hate (I have had a few), plan your escape and at some point, jump off the cliff.  If you don't grab for a branch on the way down, you will know freedom upon landing.  It might not look like what you thought it would but there is relief and "the next indicated step" towards a fulfilled, artistic life.
4. CONGRATULATIONS!  I try to feel good about someone's else's success.  I try.  It is good for the universe, it is good for the collective artistic minds around me and it is good for my ego to say Congratulations!  I have to learn over and over that jealousy equals misery, that fear and anger over what I don't have equals being stuck right there and that genuine support and happiness for someone else's successes actually helps me learn, makes me feel good and provides me with inspiration in my work.  

I am no expert, as you can tell but I try…oh I try.

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